For the rest of my life

A fire burning my body
A flame deep in my heart
I realize something
A mysterious figure
Faceless, yet beautiful

It watches with delight
It smiles and laughs
Silence covers up my ears
Fire is my soulmate
Love is my fuel

I am so different
Cheerfulness claims me in the day
But at night darkness confronts me
I wish that fakeness would be the answer

Deep down I am empty
Choices are the hardest decisions for me
I always choose the wrong
Or the hardest riddle

Wishes never come true
I wished I could fly, I can't
I wished for more, never came
All dreams are long forgotten

I try to drown emptiness out of me
But flooding is too harsh in this case
Advice never works for me
Does life have to be this rough

Sometimes I think I am nothing against them
I am silly, a lost cause
Hugs don't warm my heart
Tears just cause earthquakes
That won't shut up

No bandages can heal me
One more word and I'll be crying with the shadows
I sit in my own blood and don't stop bleeding
Everything can shatter anytime

A volcano sits in my brain
One day it's too late to erupt
My courage hides in the inside
It doesn't dare to explode

I can't risk to be killed again
I can not dare to divorce myself from my head
My heart has enough courage to jump into the most insane place
My head thinks of me

Whatever I choose
I'll have to live with it
For the rest of my life
A sadness I can't just run from